I cannot say how much I appreciate those of you who READ my blog. I love to write and express myself through the written word, so all those great comments and letters I get praising my writing--really thanks for reading and the kind words really mean something to me.
Now read some more...
I get asked whether I actually (ME, Caprice Fellini) actually write these entries. I know a lot of Dommes who do not do their own work--cause they have slaves do it. I have been tempted with that, but I don't feel right having an impostor speak for me, or give up that kind of control over what is on the internet in MY name. I do all my writing, design, photography (most)--I am a control freak. I am not like many people out there, let alone the Dommes out there--I try to be as genuine and as accessible as possible. There is a certain level of vulnerability in that in a profession based on the opposite--but I think that making a connection and truly understanding the core dynamic of submission and Domination--will provide a more genuine session than just going through the motions. The grocery lists of wants/likes/limits are necessary but it in no way expresses the complexity of what can REALLY be achieved from BDSM.
This thing we do KINK is so varied and complex. A sub can be into licking armpits for the same and different reasons that a Dom might be into licking armpits. The approach and power dynamic is different, the body part is the same, fetish of armpit, or of smell--or just being forced to lick and armpit/or forcing someone to have their armpit licked. The varying degrees of complexity sometimes make it difficult for me to clearly approach a session when the information is not there. For example, I got a call from a possible client who wanted to see me be dirty in a cuckold scene so he could catch me and teach me a lesson. This got very complex really QUICK:
A: I am a Dominant--so anyone teaching ME a lesson is preposterous and goes against my Dominant nature.
B: I do cuckolding scenes where the cuck is a SUB not a Dom or someone angry about what I do.
C: he refused to explain what teaching me a lesson was, he insinuated sex--I don't offer sex...
If I am fucking my bull and you want to act like you caught me, that is ONE thing, but to take an assertive or Dominant stance against my Dominance is just going against what I am clear I am: a TOP, a Domme, in charge. Its important to KNOW who you are and who you are contacting before you ask for something that isn't LOGICAL or on the table.
Today I had someone call me with a very somber tone in their voice. A young gentleman really confused, asks if I can teach him to how be a man--to stop being such a sensitive emotional guy. He kept telling me about his past, how insecure he feels. He seriously just needed someone to talk to, I gave him some advice, which I hope he takes and really uses; more importantly telling it to someone what I passionately feel about having a positive outlook on life and living for the moment and not wallowing on the past is something I needed to hear. I usually tend to have a very in the moment type of attitude, but lately I've been focused on the past too--and if anything I helped myself in helping others. Its funny that life is always a balance of plus and minus, yin and yang, sub and Dominant.